I was diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer in September 2023. As a fit and somewhat healthy 38-year-old this came as a shock to me. I regularly checked my poops and noticed small blood blobs and a flattened shape around May 2023. It did not go away. So I went to my GP who referred me to a gastroenterologist without hesitation. A few months later I had a colonoscopy.
Before the colonoscopy my gastroenterologist was 99% sure my symptoms were indicative of ulcerative colitis but he (and I) wanted to be sure. A 5cm carcinoma that almost blocked my sigmoid colon was seen right away. Scans showed that the cancer spread all around my liver, abdominal lymph nodes and peritoneum. I zoned out for the conversation with the doctors after hearing this news but heard phrases like 'very unlikely', ‘more time’ and 'advanced Stage 4'.
Fast forward a few days and the cancerous mass was removed in a large operation and I started palliative chemotherapy (FOLFOXIRI with Bevacizumab immunotherapy) soon after. The word 'palliative' triggered me into a google rabbit hole and I almost gave up hope. I always thought of palliative as a word to describe the treatment of elderly people who are at the end of their days.
My oncologist described palliative chemotherapy as treatment for living with cancer as opposed to curative chemotherapy as it was highly unlikely that they would be able to cure it. Reading stories of other people who were a similar age to me overcome this diagnosis helped me continue to remain positive.
Chemotherapy is hard to describe. Such weird side effects that seemed to constantly change each chemotherapy session (mouth ulcers, super sensitivity to anything remotely cold, gagging at the smell of food and reflux). I lost about 10 kilograms in weight as my appetite was just not there anymore. My main side effect was fatigue. I thought I had moments of fatigue pre-cancer but holy moley that was nothing.
My step count averaged 1000 steps per day during the first weeks of chemo. Watching TV and talking to family/friends was too much effort and I just went into a daze as a flurry of days flew by.
As my wife was heavily pregnant and I could not work, we worried a lot about the future. There was no certainty anymore. Everything was turned upside down all of a sudden. Priorities shifted. I could not help but think about my mortality and what would happen to my wife and (soon to be born) daughter if I died far sooner than I ever imagined.
Throughout this challenging time, we had awesome support from family, friends and colleagues. People would drop off frozen dinners, organised fundraisers, bought us groceries, travelled hours to come and visit, and were just there for myself and my wife. Everyone has been affected by cancer and I really saw the kindness in people who obviously empathised with our situation. I am truly thankful to all those people.
To everyone’s surprise, after only 3 months of chemotherapy my scans revealed no signs of cancer anywhere. My body’s metabolic response was incredible. I have now been moved onto ‘maintenance’ chemotherapy for three months. My mood has lifted and I feel far more positive about the future.
To the nurses, doctors and hospital staff – you are all legends and I am so thankful for your work. How you do your job day in and day out amazes me.